They call me Herr Professor Docktor 

Hugo Z Hackenbush

August 18th - on the set in Buch, Germany - with "Wife" for  Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck's production of Werk Ohne Autor.

   Ken Starr

Jan 20, 2017 as reported on the APR

Today on Afghanistan Public Radio’s premiere news show, Karzai Talk, the following was reported by Slick of the Slick and Slack Karzai Brothers:

Washington, DC. January 20th. Within minutes of his inauguration as the 45th President of the United States, Donald J Trump made good on a campaign promise. Kellyanne Conway, White House Press Secretary read the following statement:

“As my first act as your President of the United States, I have selected a man well qualified for the very, very important position as Independent Counsel in the new investigation of The Clinton Foundation.

Judge Ken Starr.

Judge Starr is a fine man, very fine man who has served brilliantly, very brilliantly  and - might I add - steadfast - and diligent - very diligent - during his tenure as President and Chancellor of Baylor University.”

Reached later in the day, Judge Starr had this brief comment, “I am honoured once again to serve my country and head up a fair and thorough investigation of the Clintons - ah - The Clinton Foundation. Though, I do recall that old Wrigley Gum slogan: “Double Your Pleasure Double Your Fun.”

Former President Bill Clinton tweeted this response: I never had gum with that person.”

Welcome to Amarillo Texas 

and to the Coyote Bluff Cafe

Could this be the home of the ultimate Hamburger?

It is a mighty long way from Silbersteinstrasse in Berlin.

In case I do decide to go - I’ve pulled from their website directions how to get there.

A bit connipted, but here goes:

 - Silbersteinstrasse to Tegel Airport by Taxi: 12 miles
 - Tegel to JFK: 3954 miles - pick up a Thrifty car rental
 -  and drive, baby, drive the 1,734 miles for what a lot of folks call
    the best burger in the Americas...

Here are your driving instructions:

01. Head south on I-678 S
02. Take exit B toward 130th Pl
03. Keep right at the fork and merge onto 130th Pl
04. Keep left to stay on 130th Pl
05. Continue straight to stay on 130th Pl
06. Keep left to continue on Pan Am Ave
07. Turn right onto Lefferts Blvd
08. Turn left onto N Conduit Ave
09. Turn left onto the Belt Pkwy W ramp to Verrazano Bridge
10. Merge onto Belt Pkwy
11. Take exit 3 for Interstate 278 W/Verrazano Br toward Staten Island
12. Keep left at the fork and merge onto Verrazano-Narrows Bridge
13. Continue onto I-278 W
14. Keep left to stay on I-278 W - Entering New Jersey
15. Take the I-278 exit on the left Toll road
16. Keep right at the fork, follow signs for I-95 S/Turnpike S
17. Keep left at the fork and merge onto I-95 S
18. Continue onto NJ Tpke S
19. Take exit 6 for I-276 W toward Penn Turnpike
20. Continue onto I-276 W - Entering Pennsylvania
21. Keep left at the fork to stay on I-276 W
22. Continue onto I-76 W
23. Take exit 75 for I-70 W toward Wheeling WV
24. Continue onto I-70 W
25. Keep left at the fork to stay on I-70 W - Entering West Virginia
26. Keep left at the fork to continue on I-470 W, follow signs for Columbus
27. Entering Ohio - Merge onto I-70 W
28. Keep right at the fork to stay on I-70 W,  follow signs for Interstate70 W/Dayton/OH-315 N
29. Keep left to stay on I-70 W
30. Keep left to stay on I-70 W - Entering Indiana
31. Keep left to stay on I-70 W
32. Keep right at the fork to stay on I-70 W, follow signs for Interstate 70 W/Airport/St Louis -
33. Entering Illinois - Keep right at the fork to stay on I-70 W - follow signs for Interstate 70 W/Saint Louis

34. Take the Interstate 55 S/Interstate 70 exit on the left 

toward St Louis

35. Merge onto I-55 S/I-70 W
36. Keep left at the fork to continue on I-55 S
37. Keep right to continue on I-55 S/I-64 W - Entering Missouri
38. Take exit 40B W for I-44 toward I-70/Kansas St/Walnut St
39. Keep left at the fork and merge onto I-44/I-55 S
40. Keep right at the fork to continue on I-44, follow signs for 290C/12th St/Gravois Ave
41. Keep left to stay on I-44 - Entering Oklahoma
42. Take exit 34 to merge onto I-44 W/US-412 W toward OK-66/Tulsa
43. Keep left at the fork to continue on I-44
44. Take the OK-66 W/Interstate 44 W exit on the left toward Sapulpa/Okla. City
45. Merge onto I-44/OK-66 W
46. Keep right to continue on I-44
47. Keep right to continue on I-44 W
48. Continue onto John Kilpatrick Turnpike
49. Take the exit onto I-40 W toward Amarillo - Entering Texas
50. Take exit 72B toward Grand St
51. Merge onto Interstate 40 Access Rd
52. Turn left onto S Grand St

End destination: Coyote Bluff Cafe

2417  2116 S Grand St, Amarillo, TX 79103

ps: make sure to bring plenty of napkins

Donald Trump - One Time Broadway Producer

Paris Is Out!

At 23, The Donald gave it his best shot.

In 1970 he met with Broadway producer David Black and fronted half of the costs to get Paris Is Out! onto Broadway. The Richard Seff play had an off-Broadway run in Paramus, NJ and for a mere S70,000 the Donald - as co-producer - planted his name up on Broadway.

As reported in the NY Times:

“Paris Is Out!,” which starred Sam Levene, a veteran film and stage actor, alongside Ms. Picon, had its admirers during an earlier production in Paramus, N.J. But the producers were so worried about critical reaction that they held no press performances, and with good reason — the critics were unimpressed. In The New York Times, Clive Barnes wrote, “I pitied it more than I disliked it,” but called it “a bad play.”

To be fair, the play did get some positive reviews.

Paris Is Out! closed after 96 performances. Any chance of a revival? With the casting of Whoopie Goldberg and Richard Dreyfuss?

Any one for a Slice?

This year eleven folks in Naples had their eye on setting the record for the longest Pizza ever baked... seems that they nabbed it.

After using over 4000 pounds flour, 3200 pounds tomatoes, 4000 pounds mozzarella, 60 pound of Basil, and 58 gallons of oil, the deed was done... one mile of seaside road paved with Pizza.

Rumour has it for the next time around , they’ll haul in a ton of local anchovies for the extra topping. 

A Slice of Life

Again, on a food kick... chalk it up to the aftermath of being back on the Mosley plan.

I guess it was a logical development on how one sells a product. We’re all used to paying more for selected seats in a Cinema. Ditto for travel arrangements.

Now you can be more discerning in satiating your Brownie addiction.

With all the complexities of modern life - not the least being trampled by smartphone wielding teenagers hunting Zenheadbutt - we are now confronted by Brownie Segregation that challenges the notion that out of one pan, all Brownies are created equal.

Notice that all pre-wrapped Brownies are priced the same... for now.

I’m sure further down the Brown Brick Road of Brownies this will change.

Perhaps the esteemed Senator from the Chocolate State of Pennsylvania - home of Hershey - may well propose Federal funding to study the impact of segregating Brownies, seeking answers to far reaching questions such as:

°°° are corner sections perceived as sweeter than the edges?
°°° do upper mobility females choose edges more often than their male counterparts?
°°° do Presidential candidates seek out the center?

As I see it, pre-wrapping Brownies is a small step as to how easily we can let ourselves be “sliced and diced” and limits what choices are ours.

Free choice is a wonderful thing, if you are free to do so at your own bidding.

Politicians and Eats ... does seem that I am on a food kick today

Question: when was the last time that you saw a photo of The Donald where he looked - well - content? Perhaps even satisfied?

Try this one... Trump aboard his private jet, dining on a meal prepared by The Colonel. Though it might be likely that it was assembled by a low wage earner from a dubious cultural background with an iffy residental status.

Looking at this photo and I wonder how many folks eat their KFC fried chicken with a fork and butter knife? Could this be an efficient way to prolong the dinning experience? As they say on  many badly scripted tv series...”Just wonderin’”

Sandwiches that Meet the Challenge: The Whole Hog

Are you ready to plow into this one?

Grub Street cited the results of this year’s Xtreme Eating Awards laid out by The Center for Science in the Public’s Interest.


It seems Uno Pizzeria takes the very fat biscuit, belly down:


“The item that blew the others away comes from Uno Pizzeria this time. Appropriately dubbed the Whole Hog, its gut-buster of a burger hopes to entice prospective patrons with this menu description:

Think you can handle this Whole Hog Burger? OVER A POUND OF MEAT. Hamburger, sausage, bacon, prosciutto and pepperoni. PLUS — Four types of cheese, garlic mayo & pickles. With fries & onion rings. Extra napkins free!
The Whole Hog has 2,850 calories, which, if anyone’s counting, takes about a half-day of gym time to burn off. Perhaps worse yet, it also packs in 62 grams of saturated fat, or three days’ supply per the government’s dietary guidelines, and nearly six days’ worth of sodium (9,790 milligrams). “You might as well eat four McDonald’s Quarter Pounders with Cheese and two medium fries doused with 18 packets of salt,” CSPI advises.”

           Forget the Rod, Grab a stick of Dynamite

Alligator gar, the second-largest U.S. freshwater fish behind the West Coast’s white sturgeon, have shown a taste for Asian carp, which have been spreading and out-competing native fish for food. The gar dwarf the invaders, which themselves can grow to 4 feet and 100 pounds. The world-record alligator gar was 8 ½ feet and 327 pounds, though they can grow larger.

Native Americans once used their enamel-like scales as arrow points, and early settlers covered plow blades with their tough skin and scales. But a mistaken belief that they hurt sportfish led to widespread extermination throughout the 1900s, when they were often shot or blown up with dynamite.